Dictation: should I marry a double faced old man?

After just four years of marriage, Liu Yin (not her real name) was betrayed by love and her family broke up. From then on, she became afraid of marriage and lost confidence in men. Three years later, Liu Yin met a mature and enthusiastic Yuan Lin (not her real name). In her contacts with Yuan Lin, Liu Yin was sometimes moved by his concern, sometimes confused by his lies, sometimes overwhelmed by his kindness, and sometimes worried about his tact. Her dual character makes her more and more unable to see through the man around her

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● talker: Liu Yin (alias)

● gender: Female

● age: 35

marriage is broken

I don’t believe in love anymore

In 1998, my husband and I formed a family, and the next year we had the crystallization of love. Who would have expected that the vows of love still lingered in my ears, and my husband changed his heart. Since I had a daughter, I have almost transferred my energy to my child. Maybe I care less about him. In 2002, he fell in love with a 19-year-old girl.

No matter how I begged and how my family persuaded me, my husband was determined to marry that girl. What broke my heart even more was that he quietly transferred all his family’s property, and his only small house was to be shared equally with me. In the autumn of 2003, we finally ended our love. After the divorce, we were entangled in property issues for several years. After such a painful experience, I gradually became afraid of marriage and lost confidence in men.

make new friends

deep feeling of comfort

In April this year, I met Yuan Lin (not his real name) through a friend’s introduction.

The first time we met, he told me frankly that he was nine years older than me and worked in a public institution after transferring from the army; Two years ago, his wife moved away from him, so they divorced; Now, my son has graduated from university and is working in Beijing. I think this man is older than me, but he doesn’t look old at all. Judging from his speech, he is a trustworthy person.

Because of my good impression, I promised to keep going with him. Seeing that I was not enthusiastic about anything, Yuan Lin often advised me that you were still young and could not lose confidence in life if you were hit. People should treat themselves as a ball. The harder difficulties beat us, the higher we should jump. His words made me feel very warm, because in the past few years of divorce, no one really cared and encouraged me. He took me to parties and made new friends, which made a great change in my life.

lied about age

I doubt him.

One day in June this year, a comrade in arms of Yuan Lin came to Qingdao for a meeting. Yuan Lin took me to dinner. During the dinner, they talked about many unforgettable experiences. Listening, I suddenly realized that those experiences did not match his age. According to the age he told me, he should have had a son at the age of 19. But he had only recently joined the army at that time. How could he get married and have children?

Later, I asked Yuan Lin how old he was, and he told me that he was 14 years older than me. The reason why he lied to me was that he liked me and hoped to come with me. This matter made me feel uncomfortable. I was worried that he had other things to hide from me. At the same time, I was worried that the huge age difference would not bring about a happy marriage. Yuan Lin saw that I was hesitant and swore that there was no lie about anything except my age. I believed him now.

two sides of character

I can’t tell who he is.

In August this year, Yuan Lin came to know a fellow villager named Jiannan (not his real name). His child has reached the school age, but because of autism, no school will accept him.

In order to help Jiannan, Yuan Lin asked for help everywhere. After running from school to hospital, within ten days, he not only found a school for his children, but also invited an expert to treat children’s autism. I was deeply moved by his helpfulness.

In early September, I took Yuan Lin back to his hometown in Laixi. I heard that he is from Northeast China. My parents told me quietly that the man in Northeast China is too grumpy. We are worried that you will be bullied if you marry him. I had no prejudice against outsiders, but when I heard what my parents said, I was a little shaken when I thought of his tactfulness. I am a woman who has been hurt by marriage. In terms of feelings, I really can’t bear any harm because I am fragile.

From Yuan Lin, I saw many excellent qualities, but he also had many worries. What kind of person is he? The more I understand him, the more I can’t figure it out. During the National Day holiday, he proposed to me, but should I agree to him

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