Trial marriage has certain advantages, but there are also certain risks. To avoid aesthetic fatigue or fierce contradictions in the life of cohabitation before marriage, trial marriage families should make the following nine psychological preparations.
1. If you choose to live together, you should be prepared to discover his shortcomings that you do not know
Before cohabitation, every time we dated, we showed our most perfect side in front of each other. After cohabitation, we might relax our vigilance and completely expose our real life state to each other. Now that you have chosen to live together, you should be fully prepared mentally, meet all his shortcomings you know, learn how to tolerate each other, and adjust your mode of getting along in time.
2. Don’t interfere with each other’s privacy. Cohabitation does not mean that he is your private property
Respect each other’s privacy even after marriage. Cohabitation does not mean that you should check each other’s privacy. He is not your personal property, and there is no need to be frank and lenient about his privacy. Pay more attention to your future and less attention to his past, so that you can get a sense of happiness and security more easily.
3. While simulating marriage life, don’t forget that life needs sentiment, and occasional romance must be adhered to
Although cohabitation is an early stage of married life, even if you are really married, you should still remember to add spice to your life. Don’t leave life with only daily necessities. Remember to go out for a romantic date occasionally. It is also a good choice to snuggle up and watch a movie after a candlelight dinner. The occasional romance can make your cohabitation life less boring.
4. Don’t pretend to be his wife just because you live together, let alone his nanny
Maybe you think that since we live together, I should take good care of him and make him feel that I am a good wife and mother. In fact, this idea is completely wrong. A man’s choice of a life-long partner is definitely not to put whether you are a good domestic helper in the first place. What he needs is not only a life partner, but also hope that you can share the same soul.
So don’t enter the role as soon as you cohabit. It’s hard for a woman like a nanny to win the favor of a man because she thinks she is his wife. If this is a thing that everyone can do well, it’s absolutely unnecessary for him to pick you up to socialize with.
5. Give each other some freedom. Don’t control him and his friends like a housekeeper
The relationship between two people is like a rubber band. If you pull it too tight, it will break even though it is elastic. When cohabiting, don’t start to take charge of everything like a housekeeper, and don’t kill him when he is gathering with friends. Give each other some freedom, and don’t let your cohabitation life feel depressed.
6. Don’t involve your families in your life too early
Don’t meet each other’s family too soon. When your own cohabitation life is not completely stable, remember this. The problems of your family may become the fuse of your quarrel. You’d better enjoy and consolidate your cohabitation life first.
7. Cohabitation is not really marriage, and there is no need to share finance
Choosing to cohabit does make your relationship closer, but don’t be so close that you and I don’t even have the same income. In fact, financial management can reduce a lot of contradictions and make each other feel respected. Don’t take his wallet for granted.
8. Respect each other’s living habits and try to accommodate each other
In cohabitation, it is a big question whether the living habits of both parties can be well run in. Many couples who were originally harmonious parted ways because their living habits could not be coordinated after cohabitation. Therefore, we should learn to accommodate each other’s living habits and take a step back from each other. If the other party is not used to staying up late, you should not always be a night owl.
9. Pay attention to your personal image. It doesn’t matter if you are plain faced. You can’t dress too sloppy
Don’t let the other person whisper in his heart, “so she’s like this at home.”. Even if you live together at home, you should also pay attention to your appearance. It is perfectly OK to be plain faced, but you must not appear in front of him in a untidy way, which will destroy your beauty in his mind.
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