10 ways to get started in life

The key to making the journey of life more exciting and ambitious is to have a good attitude. The University of California, Berkeley has launched an activity called “better action” to help people find the meaning of life through practice. You may as well try it.

1. Recommended frequency of doing good: every day

A study published in the Journal of the American Psychological Association found that doing five good things every week for six weeks can significantly improve the happiness of donors, especially those who focus on doing good things in one day.

Practice: do 5 good things in a week. If you can, it’s better to concentrate on one day. Good things can be big or small, but it’s better to help different people and do different things. For example, help colleagues do some trivial work, give a seat to strangers on the bus, or donate blood once.

2. Gratitude diary recommendation frequency: once a week

Research published in the Journal of personality and social psychology shows that expressing gratitude to those who have helped us will have a positive impact on our bodies and interpersonal relationships, making us feel healthier and happier.

Practice: when keeping a gratitude diary, grasp six points: be as detailed and specific as possible; Pay more attention to depth than breadth; Focusing on people to be grateful has a deeper impact than focusing on specific things; Think about what life would be like if there were no specific people or things. Don’t take good life for granted; Experience unexpected surprises; Stick to writing regularly, but don’t be too diligent. Evidence shows that it is more beneficial to write 1-3 times a week than to write every day.

3. Recommended frequency of seeing meaningful photos: once a day

Research shows that finding the meaning of life can help people fight stress and improve their overall health, which usually comes from nature and close ties with others. Remember to take some valuable photos often, which will encourage you to pay attention to all kinds of beauty in life.

How to do it: you can spend a week photographing people or various foods that make you feel better in life, or make you feel more targeted, develop the photos, and write down the reasons for taking them on the back of the photos. After that, you can often look through these photos and recall the enlightenment they bring.

4. Write a letter of understanding. Frequency of recommendation: once a week

If you often blame yourself or reflect, you may feel isolated, unhappy, and even stressed. It is suggested to face your mistakes in a healthier way, such as writing a letter to yourself, and forgiving and forgiving some mistakes with compassion. Research shows that people who can sympathize with their own shortcomings and setbacks are healthier physically and mentally than those who deeply blame themselves.

Practice: first identify a certain aspect that makes you feel ashamed, uneasy or not good enough, which can be related to personality, behavior, ability, interpersonal relationship or other aspects; Then write it down and honestly describe your feelings, such as embarrassment, pain or anger; Write a letter to yourself according to the above two aspects to express sympathy, understanding and acceptance for the aspects you dislike. Once you are in a bad mood, take out this letter and read it again, which will have an obvious alleviating effect.

5. Actively listen to recommendation frequency: once a week

Making the other party feel heard and valued is an ability, and it also needs some practice. Research shows that using this skill can make the other person feel understood and help improve the satisfaction of interpersonal relations.

Approach: find a quiet place where you can communicate with your partner without interruption and distraction. Try to do this when the other side tells you: after the other side tells you an idea, repeat it in his own language; Encourage the other party to elaborate on their ideas by asking questions when appropriate; If the other party expresses negative emotions, try to identify with them and don’t question them; Use body language to express your interest, such as eye contact, nodding, keeping a relaxed posture, and don’t always look at your mobile phone; Avoid evaluation, even if you don’t fully agree with it; Don’t give advice, so that the other party will feel that being understood is more conducive to the solution of the problem, and it will be counterproductive to give advice in a hurry; After listening to the other party, ask permission before speaking out your own views.

6. Recommended frequency of watching awed Videos: once a month

Research shows that awe experience can improve people’s satisfaction with life and make people less disturbed by trivial things and emotions. We seldom encounter awe inspiring things in life, so we can choose some similar videos.

How to do it: spend 4-5 minutes watching a video that makes you feel small and awed, such as a documentary overlooking the world, which will change your understanding of the world, find that your troubles are too small to mention, and enhance your confidence in the infinite potential of human beings.

7. Recommended frequency of focused breathing: once a day

One way to combat negative emotions such as stress and anxiety is mindfulness practice. The so-called “mindfulness” refers to paying attention to your current thoughts and feelings, but not judging right and wrong. Research shows that “mindfulness” is related to improving health, reducing anxiety and improving pressure resistance. Focusing on breathing is a way to achieve mindfulness.

Practice: sit down or lie down in a comfortable posture, close your eyes, focus your thoughts on your breathing, and feel the changes between breathing and breathing.

8. Recommended frequency of experiencing life details: once a day for a week

Paying attention to some details in life can also play the role of “mindfulness” practice. For example, careful observation and experience before eating raisins can achieve similar effects.

How to do it: take a raisin and put it in your hand. Carefully observe its color and whether there are wrinkles on the surface; Rotate the raisins to observe their texture; Smell it carefully; Put raisins in your mouth, carefully feel its shape and taste.

9. Want to recommend while walking frequency: once a day

When walking or jogging, pay attention to the change of each step and the action itself.

Practice: if you walk fast, you can feel the feeling of leg movement; If you walk slowly, you should pay attention to the lifting, moving and lowering of each foot. In any case, you should concentrate on the movement of walking. In order to maintain sharp awareness, at the beginning, it is best to meditate on every move of lifting, moving and lowering your feet.

10. Write “unpleasant” recommendation frequency: once a day

We often need to vent against psychological pressure. Research shows that writing down “unhappy” can increase happiness, reduce depression and anxiety symptoms, strengthen the immune system, and improve work and learning performance. These benefits can even last for months.

Practice: write down your inner feelings when facing emotional challenges every day. This “unpleasant” experience may be related to your childhood experience, parent-child relationship, your past or present lovers and friends, and even your professional experience. Therefore, you should mainly write about your experience related to your emotions, but don’t record this trouble.

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